Philippians 4:6-7 “Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God. And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.”

One of the pillars to gaining a personal relationship with God is daily prayer. This is our privilege that He has granted us to have open, continuous conversation with Him whenever we want. What other god, king, or ruler allows this?! Are we taking advantage of this privilege? 

The more you talk with God, the closer you become with Him.

In this blog post, we will talk about the foundation of prayer life, why daily prayer is important, and how to GROW in your prayer life!

You know when you first meet someone, you engage in polite, small talk. But then each time you hang out with them, conversations become more natural. That is how God wants our prayers to be.

We still should come to Him in reverence as we are talking to The King; however, we can talk to Him in the comforts of knowing He is our friend. My goal is to have a conversation with Jesus via prayer as if He is sitting right next to me, and I have known Him for years… because guess what? Both of those statements are true. He is always right next to me, and He has been my Father for years.

But sometimes, prayers can feel unnatural due to my own faults. I am not sure when or where I learned the habit of talking to God in a very formal, structured way with using big vocabulary words. God does not require that at all. He wants our prayers to be sincere, vulnerable, and honest. Am I being sincere when I am trying to be something/ someone I am not? Am I being vulnerable when I am covering my true feelings with fancy words? Am I being honest when I choose not to pray about something because it does not seem appropriate? 

Let all your guards down, put away ‘fancy prayer language’, and simply have a conversation with God. As if he was your best friend who you feel so comfortable around telling them anything with confidence that they will still love you no matter what you say. Because guess what, again? That is Jesus! Anything that is on your heart, tell it to the Father. He wants to know! Just like when we grow in our walk, we grow closer to knowing God, He also is growing closer to knowing us, too! But we cannot hold things inside. He wants everything. Lay it at His feet and know that He is listening and loving. 

A song that I love so much and reminds me of the very special relationship we have with our Father is “What a friend we have in Jesus”. When I am going through a storm, I often listen to this song on repeat to remind myself that I am not alone, Jesus hears my prayers, and I need to give Him everything. I have listed the lyrics to this beautiful hymn below. Read and meditate over these words to acknowledge how wonderful our God is: 

“What a Friend we have in Jesus,

  All our sins and griefs to bear!

What a privilege to carry

  Everything to God in prayer!

O what peace we often forfeit,

  O what needless pain we bear,

All because we do not carry

  Everything to God in prayer!

Have we trials and temptations?

  Is there trouble anywhere?

We should never be discouraged,

  Take it to the Lord in prayer.

Can we find a friend so faithful

  Who will all our sorrows share?

Jesus knows our every weakness,

  Take it to the Lord in prayer.

Are we weak and heavy-laden,

  Cumbered with a load of care?

Precious Savior, still our refuge—

  Take it to the Lord in prayer;

Do thy friends despise, forsake thee?

  Take it to the Lord in prayer;

In His arms He’ll take and shield thee,  Thou wilt find a solace there.” – Joseph M. Scriven

So, we know the foundation of prayer life and recognize that we need to GROW in it. Now let’s talk about why we need to GROW in our prayer life:

Why we Should Pray Daily: 

COMMANDMENT FROM THE LORD:

Romans 12:12 “Rejoicing in hope; patient in tribulation; continuing instant in prayer” 

1 Thessalonians 5:17 “Pray without ceasing.”

Colossians 4:2 “Continue in prayer, and watch in the same with thanksgiving.”

From these verses, we see that God commands us to continue in prayer without ceasing- that means daily and throughout the day.

There are many examples in the Bible of Jesus praying. Although it does not specifically explain His prayer routine, it is evident that it was consistent and devoted.

He kept an open conversation with His Father to gain understanding and direction (Luke 6:12-13), to give thanks (Matthew 14:19), to pray for others (Luke 22:32), and pray for the Lord’s will (Matthew 26:36-39). 

To be more Christ-like, we have to follow His actions and commandments. When the Word states “pray without ceasing, continue in prayer, continuing instant in prayer” that is a command not a recommendation.

Now, this does not mean for 24 hours everyday we are to be on our knees in prayer with God, but to keep short accounts with Him.

CONFESSION OF SINS:

Acts 3:19: “Repent ye therefore, and be converted, that your sins may be blotted out, when the times of refreshing shall come from the presence of the Lord.” 

Psalm 139:23-24: “Search me, O God, and know my heart: try me, and know my thoughts: And see if there be any wicked way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.”

One of the reasons we are commanded to pray daily is to confess and ask forgiveness of our sins- which happens daily and multiple times within each day because we are human! We need to pray to be sensitive to our sins.

Again, we are human, so it is natural for us to sin all throughout the day. That does not give us the freedom to do whatever we want and write it off as “being human”. God understands we are not perfect, but He desires for us to be more like Him.

If it breaks God’s heart, it should break ours.

Once we realize we have sinned, we must go to God to ask for forgiveness. That is what being instant and continuous in prayer means. Throughout the day, ask God to forgive you for your sins. Keep a short account where you are continuously returning back to Him.

Maybe you go throughout the day and do not realize a situation where you sinned. That happens to everyone. So, we have to pray for God to reveal those moments in the day/ our life where we sinned without knowing. We have to seek purification from any sinful tendencies, ultimately seeking guidance and direction in the path of righteousness.

CLEAN HEART:

Psalm 51:10 “Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me.”

Proverbs 4:23 “Keep thy heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life.”

Once we realize we have to be sensitive to our sins, we need to pray for the Lord to help us change our hearts.

The heart is a popular topic in the Bible. Rightfully so due to the fact that what we cultivate in our hearts will be shown in our words, actions, and thoughts.

You know the saying “you are what you eat”? Meaning if you eat unhealthy and bad, you will feel unhealthy and bad- and vice versa with eating healthy. The same principle applies to our heart. My associate pastor in our hometown church preached a message “I am what my Heart Is”. That is a message I will never forget. It revealed to me that if my attitude, actions, words, and thoughts are hateful, negative, worldly, ungodly, etc. then this indicates the nature of my heart. The nature of my heart is a direct correlation of what I am feeding it via entertainment, conversation with others, information, etc.

Matthew 15:18-19: “But those things which proceed out of the mouth come forth from the heart; and they defile the man. For out of the heart proceed evil thoughts, murders, adulteries, fornications, thefts, false witness, blasphemies.”

If what I am allowing in my heart is not linear to Christ, then I will not be Christ- like. Instead, if I guard my heart with what I view for entertainment, surround myself with godly influences that speak truth and positivity as children of God, go to church, and read His word, then I will demonstrate characteristics of Christ.

These characteristics are also known as the fruit of the Spirit (click here to read my entire blog post on how to GROW in the fruit of the spirit!).

So, everyday, we have to pray for God to create a clean heart within us. Then we have to guard our heart fervently to renew a right spirit within us.

GIVE THANKS

Philippians 4:6 “Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God.”

Want to know how to find joy in life? Give thanks to God.

Jesus demonstrated gratitude during prayer in the Bible on multiple occasions. Like we talked about in the above sections, if Jesus did it, we should too. We are called to follow in His footsteps. Here are examples in the Bible of Jesus giving thanks to God:

1. Feeding the Five Thousand (Mark 6:41; John 6:11):

• When Jesus miraculously fed the multitude with five loaves of bread and two fish, before distributing the food, He looked up to heaven, blessed the food, and gave thanks.

2. The Last Supper (Matthew 26:26-27; Mark 14:22-23; Luke 22:17-19; 1 Corinthians 11:23-24):

• During the Last Supper, Jesus took bread, gave thanks, broke it, and gave it to His disciples to break the bread and drink from the cup. 

3. Raising Lazarus from the Dead (John 11:41-42):

• Before calling Lazarus out of the tomb, Jesus prayed to the Father and said, “Father, I thank you that you have heard me. I knew that you always hear me, but I said this for the benefit of the people standing here, that they may believe that you sent me.”

4. Before the Confession of Peter (Matthew 16:19):

• Jesus gave thanks before Peter’s confession of Him being the Christ, the Son of the living God.

I am sure you know the saying “there is always something to be thankful for”, but it is so true. God is protecting you from a situation that could be so much worse.

You have to train yourself to find the good in situations and to notice the little things that you probably overlook everyday. You have to teach yourself how to have an attitude of gratitude. Even though I am continuously working on my attitude of gratitude, it has grown greatly over the years for two reasons.

1. My husband.

Devin is the most grateful person I know. He will thank me for everything! This includes things that are natural to do and are not me sacrificing anything to do them. Every time I cook dinner, clean the house, put sheets on the bed, put a new roll of paper towels out, switch the clothes from the washing machine to the dryer, get gas in the car, etc. he thanks me. We have been married since 2018, and he still continues to do this today. Over time, I began to adopt this character from him and have been trying to do better at showing him gratitude for everything he does. He is still way better at it than I am, but I have grown in being more conscious of ways to show him I am grateful for everything he does for our family. 

2. “1,000 Gifts” by Ann Voskamp.

This book changed my life in the best way possible! She challenges the reader to find 1,000 things to be thankful for. It seems daunting and very hard at first, but I promise once you start noticing the ‘little things’, you will meet the 1,000 goal very quickly. She taught me to find gratitude in the mundane activities.

Here is an example of finding thanks with washing the dishes:

Washing the Dishes:

1. I am thankful I have good, nutritious food to eat. 
2. I am thankful I have a family to eat with. 
3. I am thankful for the smell of hot water and soap. 
4. I am thankful for the feeling of my hands after putting them in soapy water. 
5. I am thankful for the art of making new recipes. 
6. I am thankful for my ability to be able to eat food with no physical barriers. 
7. I am thankful for the empty sink after this chore.
8. I am thankful for fragrant soap. 
9. I am thankful for the conversations that were had during that meal. 
10. I am thankful for this alone time to talk to God while I wash the dishes. 

There are 10 examples of gratitude from one activity- and not a very pretty, shiny activity either! I found beauty in the ordinary. Once you start being more grateful, the more beauty in the ordinary you will see. 

I recommend you getting a journal to write your “1,000 gifts” in! I use this prayer journal that has a gratitude section in it and exactly 1,000 lines to fit your 1,000 thanks for the year!

Here is the link to my prayer journal.

When we find gratitude in all the different areas of our lives, we will be more joyful. Because we have God as our Heavenly Father, there are so many ways to give thanks to Him. Giving thanks gives us joy, and it also is a testimony of our relationship with Christ to others. When others see our joyful spirits and our continuous gratitude, we can be a witness to them.

In those situations when the last thing we want to do is be grateful, those are the moments when we should be the most. People are watching. At every moment in the day we have the opportunity to display Christ’s love for us. Being consistent in your gratitude (especially in moments when it is hard or unexpected) is a perfect opportunity to be a light for Christ. 

One quote from the book “1,000 Gifts” that I love is “Gratitude turns what we have into enough”. Again, it is learning to find the beauty in the moment to be fully present.

BUILD A RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD:

Psalm 62: 8 “Trust in Him at all times; ye people, pour out your heart before him: God is a refuge for us”. 

Like stated above, praying to God is the open conversation we have with Him. He may speak to us through the Word and/ or our conscience, but we can speak to Him through prayer.  

I once heard on a podcast that praying and meeting with God daily is linear to dating someone you plan to marry… let me explain! If you plan on marrying a specific person that you may not know very well yet, you would never only spend one day a week with them for only 5-10 minutes. You would spend as much time as possible with them to learn more about them and to know them. This is like our relationship with God via prayer and time with Him. We are his bride (Revelation 19:7 & 21:2). The day is approaching where we will be joined with Him. How much time did we spend getting to know the One we will spend eternity with?

Even though we serve a God who knows EVERYTHING we are thinking, going through, worrying about, etc., He still wants us to pray to Him about it. Why would we need to pray if He already knows what we need/ what we are going to ask for? I have wondered this a few times, too.

I have come to the realization that when I do not pray to God about my worries and thoughts, I am harboring these requests pridefully. It is not our job to have everything figured out and to plan for situations on our own. That is God’s job. But if we do not bring it to Him in prayer, we are demonstrating independence rather than dependence.

We have to put our pride aside, and realize our true dependence on God. Every involuntary and voluntary function that we produce is because God allowed it. That breath that you just inhaled and exhaled without consciously thinking about it- God was in control of that. We have to depend on Him for everything! We have to travel light and lay that request at His feet. Take it off your shoulders and rest in His provision.

Matthew 11:30 “For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light”.

When God wants to know everything, that includes your vulnerable thoughts and feelings. Like stated above, we should be reverent and respectful approaching the Lord in prayer; however, we are to be honest. That includes pouring your heart out to God.

He wants to hear all of it! Your questions, your confusions, your hurt, your desires, your confessions, your wants, etc. should be brought before Him. This allows Him to know us better. And again, to see that we are laying it all at His feet, sincerely. This demonstrates our trust in Him. We trust that He will provide comfort to the requests.

The Bible commands us to pour our hearts before Him.

Psalm 62: 8 “Trust in Him at all times; ye people, pour out your heart before him: God is a refuge for us”. 

There are also examples in the Bible of characters pouring their hearts before God. Here are some examples:

1. Hannah (1 Samuel 1:10-20)- A Prayer of Desire:

Hannah was barren and deeply distressed because of her inability to conceive. She prayed many times to God for the ability to carry a child. However, in one instance in the tabernacle, she poured her heart before God so much that she began weeping in anguish.

She also was praying so thoroughly to God that the Bible says she “spake in her heart; only her lips moved, but her voice was not heard” (1 Samuel 1:13). During that fervent prayer, she made a vow to God, promising to dedicate her child to Him if He would grant her a son. Because she “poured out my soul before the LORD” (1 Samuel 1:15) , the Bible tells us that “the LORD remembered her” (1 Samuel 1:19)

2. David (Psalm 51)- A Prayer of Forgiveness:

David is known for many popular events in his life through the Bible. He is known for the attribute of his victory over Goliath (1 Samuel 17), being a “man after God’s own heart” (1 Samuel 13:14), and his sin with Bathsheba (2 Samuel 11). David’s decision of acting in lust with Bathsheba created a domino effect of multiple sins that affected multiple people.

David was confronted by the prophet Nathan regarding his sin with Bathsheba. David was convicted greatly. He prayed a powerful prayer of repentance pleading for God’s mercy. He confesses his sin and expresses deep sorrow and repentance from the depths of his heart. He is broken hearted and lays all his sins before God trusting Him to forgive. 

3. Jeremiah (Jeremiah 20:7-18)- A Prayer of Hurt and Confusion:

Jeremiah, known as the weeping prophet, openly poured out his heart to God in his prayers and laments. In Jeremiah 20:7-18, Jeremiah demonstrates three different types of prayers.

First expresses his sorrow, hardship, and reproach he endures because of his role as a prophet. He is explaining to God the feelings of despair caused by the mockery he receives when he shares God’s Word.

Second, he shifts to a prayer of trust and reliance evidenced by God’s strength and promises to deliver him from his enemies.

Lastly, he returns to the state of desperation. He curses the day of his birth, wishing he had never been born to experience such suffering and anguish.

Jeremiah’s vivid imagery depicts his deep emotional turmoil and desire to escape from the relentless persecution he faces. Jeremiah’s example reveals the intense emotional struggles that sometimes surfaces when faithfully delivering God’s messages due to overwhelming opposition and rejection. Jeremiah’s human vulnerability demonstrates the complex, yet intimate, dynamic of a relationship he and God shared. 

4. Hezekiah (2 Kings 19:14-19)- A Prayer of Deliverance and Guidance:

Hezekiah is the king of Judah. He was threatened with an attack from the Assyrian army via King Sennacherib. Prior to the threat, the Assyrian army invaded Judah and besieged several fortified cities. In response, Hezekiah paid Sennacherib a large tribute of gold and silver to appease him. King Sennacherib then sent messengers to deliver the threat via letter to Hezekiah, challenging his defiance and boasting of Assyria’s military.

The letter was intended to intimidate and demoralize Hezekiah and his people. However, Hezekiah takes the letter to the ONE and MOST MIGHTY King. He lays out the letter before God and prays fervently, pouring his soul before the Lord.

I can imagine the stress Hezekiah is carrying on his shoulders protecting his people from the threatened attack. I can also imagine the relief when he lays the load at God’s feet. In response, via Isaiah’s prophecy, God promised to defend Jerusalem and cause Sennacherib to retreat in disgrace. God assured Hezekiah that the Assyrian king would not even enter the city of Jerusalem or shoot an arrow into it (2 Kings 19:32-34). Hezekiah then prays in thanksgiving and praise for the Lord’s assurance of protection (2 Kings 19:14-19).

5. Jesus in Gethsemane (Mark 14:32-42)- A Prayer of God’s Will:

Jesus knew the hour was upon Him to face what God had prepared… to be the ultimate, perfect sacrifice for the sake of the world. Jesus went to the garden of Gethsemane to pray earnestly to God for physical and spiritual strength to face the weight of the cross. Jesus takes Peter, John, and James to the garden with Him to pray.

He becomes deeply distressed and troubled, telling them “My soul is overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death.” (Mark 14:34). How impactful that moment must have been for the three disciples- to see the One heal the sick, give sight to the blind, make the paralyzed walk, and demonstrate miracles be so humanly vulnerable with His distress. Jesus goes further into the garden to pray alone.

He pours His heart out to God for hours asking “Abba, Father, all things are possible unto thee; take away this cup from me: nevertheless not what I will, but what thou wilt.” (Mark 14:36). Despite this deep distress, Jesus demonstrates complete submission to the Father’s will, preparing himself for the events that are about to unfold. 

The desire to follow the Lord’s will was stronger than the distress. He allows God to see both sides. He pours His heart out to God to pass the cup from Him, but still prays for God’s will be done. Jesus’ prayer exemplifies complete surrender and raw emotional honesty before God. This is another example of why Jesus was the perfect sacrifice to save our souls from eternity in Hell.

So we understand the why and importance of prayer, now how do we pray? 

How to Pray Daily

First, I need to state again that we are not required to pray a “fancy” prayer with a big vocabulary and try to mimic what others say during their prayer. Your prayer should be honest and original to your requests.

Matthew 6:7-8 shows us the importance of genuine prayer: “But when ye pray, use not vain repetitions, as the heathen do: for they think that they shall be heard for their much speaking. Be not ye therefore like unto them: for your Father knoweth what things ye have need of, before ye ask him.”

This verse is part of Jesus’ teaching on prayer and contrasts the approach of honest prayer with the practices of hypocrites. Jesus instructs His followers not to pray like the hypocrites who use empty, repetitive words, thinking that they will be heard for their many words. Instead, Jesus encourages genuine, heartfelt prayer characterized by a personal relationship with God as Father.

In Matthew 6:8, Jesus assures His disciples that they do not need to use many words or elaborate requests in prayer because God already knows their needs before they ask. This verse highlights the intimate knowledge and care of God for His children. It encourages us to approach prayer with simplicity, sincerity, and trust in God’s loving provision.

But if you are someone who is new to prayer, or really wants to learn how to shape their prayer to be more genuine, Jesus gave us an outline on how to pray!

THE LORD’S PRAYER

Jesus gave us the Lord’s prayer as a guidance for how to pray. He did not give us the Lord’s prayer to repeat it verbatim. It is a model prayer given by Jesus to his disciples as an example of how to pray with reverence and trust in God’s provision, forgiveness, and protection.

Let’s look at the verse then the breakdown:

The Prayer: 

Matthew 6:9-13

9. After this manner therefore pray ye: Our Father which art in heaven, Hallowed be thy name.

10. Thy kingdom come. Thy will be done in earth, as it is in heaven.

11. Give us this day our daily bread.

12. And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors.

13. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil: For thine is the kingdom, and the power, and the glory, for ever. Amen.

The Breakdown verse by verse: 

9. Our Father which art in heaven, Hallowed be thy name.

• Begin each prayer with glorifying and honoring God. Worship Him for His power, might, and blessings He gives you daily. 

10. Thy kingdom come. Thy will be done in earth, as it is in heaven.

• Pray for the Lord’s will in your life. This includes the specific situation in your life that you are needing guidance about and the direction of your decisions each day. This is a prayer for increasing your faith.

11.  Give us this day our daily bread.

• Pray for God to provide for you. Remember above when we talked about dependence? This is where we can practice it. Ask God to provide finances for food, living expenses, and other financial stressors you may be facing currently. 

12. And forgive our debts, as we forgive our debtors.

• Pray for forgiveness. Confess your sins. Like stated above, be sensitive to your sins and keep short accounts with God. Then, ask God to reveal sins that you did not even realize you demonstrated. 

13. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil:

• Pray for God’s protection against temptation. This includes temptations of lust, corrupt communication, unhealthy habits, negative thoughts, doubts, etc. We have to bring these before God to help us to put on the Lord Jesus Christ to resist the temptation (Romans 13:14). 

13. For thine is the kingdom, and the power, and the glory, for ever. Amen.

• Close your prayer with more thanksgiving, honor, and glorifying God for what He has done and will do.

PRAY WITH EXPECTATION

When we pray to God, we are increasing and strengthening our faith. Giving our requests to Him, shows that we trust His will to be done. We have to be careful and not pray for what we want but for God’s will to be completed in the situation. Having the God that is mighty and powerful to perform miracles does not give us the freedom to ask for whatever we want!

Sometimes, His will does not match our desires. However, if we are praying for His will, we can trust that He is preparing something much greater than what we originally wanted. This can be very hard to practice and accept. But if we are more cognizant about it, we can shape how we pray to ensure we are praying for requests that align to God’s will. Either way, we can expect an answered prayer. Maybe the answer is yes, no, or not right now. No matter the answer, we have to trust that it is within God’s plan. 

Reflect on your prayers, are you praying for your answer or God’s answer?

Let’s look at some verses and context to support this: 

If you have read my blog post on Grow In Your Bible Studies you will notice that some of this content is the same. I find it best to pair my Bible studies with prayer. I like to pray before my Bible studies for God to open my eyes and heart to what He needs to say to me. Then I pray afterward for application to what I have read.

I also pray other times throughout the day away from my Bible. Because we have a Father who loves us so much, we have that freedom of open conversation 24/7. We should take advantage of that!

To make sure we are staying accountable to our command of praying here are some helpful tips:

SCHEDULE A TIME

Psalm 5:3 “My voice shalt thou hear in the morning, O Lord; in the morning will I direct my prayer unto thee, and will look up.”

With very important meetings, appointments, or reservations, everyone understands the importance of making it to that scheduled event on time. We have to treat going to God via prayer just like this. It should be noted that we serve a God that doesn’t require a set time and you can literally go to Him any second of the day, but for accountability purposes, it will benefit you to schedule prayer times throughout your day. How do we do this?

Find the time that works best for you:

Are you a morning, mid afternoon, or late nighter? Or more importantly, when is it more likely that you can be alone in your day to meet with God? Again, we can pray to God at any moment of the day, and we should be praying multiple times a day.

I benefit from scheduling one specific time in my day to pray fervently to God. Other times throughout the day may be prayers to help with the specific situation that I am currently facing, prayers over my meals, worship prayers for His beauty/ comfort/ protection/ etc., prayers to help with a decision I am facing, prayers to flee temptation, etc. With that said, I still need a specific time to be alone with God to pray my detailed requests and converse with Him.

When I decided to become more serious about my walk with God, I knew I had to become a morning person to meet with God. Now, I have found a system that works best for me to make God a priority in the morning. This has made such a difference in my day! I love starting the day with having a conversation with God. I am much more joyful and conscious of my actions throughout the day when I start it with Jesus.

I have changed my schedule around in the past years to adapt to my different jobs and living situations due to our jobs of travel therapy. In one circumstance of life, I was commuting over 30 minutes to my job. I had to get to my job very early (6:40 am) and could not find the energy to be attentive to my prayers first thing in the morning at home. So, I spent my 35 minute commute to work praying to God. That was such a special time with Him. It seemed like it was just me and Him while the world was still asleep. I would leave my house at around 6:00 am, so the sun had not even risen yet. At this time, we were living in Utah. I cannot tell you the glory I felt praying to God, seeing the stars and shooting stars in the sky, then watching the start of the sunrise. It doesn’t matter where you are, as long as you can give God your full, undivided attention and honesty in prayer. See below for more on finding a space for prayer.  

Show up to your scheduled appointment everyday:

Act as if this was your boss! You know you would do it!! But guess what? This is way more important than your boss. This is you Lord and Savior. It is a commandment in the Bible to meet with Him, but it is also a want and desire from our Father to spend time with us. He wants to spend uninterrupted time with you to show you new things about Him and yourself. I heard on a podcast once that we would never marry someone we have only talked to a few times, or only talk to maybe once a week. Being that we are the bride for Christ who is coming back to take us to Heaven one day, what will it be like when the wedding takes place? Will we know Him?

When you don’t show up, apologize. Again, as if this was your boss, apologize to God for missing your meeting. No one likes to give apologies, especially to the One who sacrificed SO MUCH for you, so this will help you stay accountable.

Set an alarm / put in on the calendar/ write it on your to do list daily: 

Find a way that makes sure you will not miss this appointment! 

When my husband proposed to me, there was a surprise engagement party waiting at my parent’s house. I’ll never forget what his cousin told me that night when she noticed how much I was playing with the ring. She told me “It feels strange having it on your finger now, but there will be a day when you have to take it off to wash the dishes, bake, etc. and that will feel even more strange”. I realized what she said stuck with me because of how beautiful the thought of that is. I vowed and continuously vow to only take my rings off to protect them as they symbolize my love and commitment to Devin. So when I take them off, it does feel unnatural and strange because I have gotten used to the feeling of them being present everyday. This relates to our scheduled time with God. Here’s what I mean:

The ring symbolizes a continual relationship that will last forever. This is like our relationship with God- although we may not talk and commune with Him like we should, have assurance that your relationship with Him will last forever. 

When you first start wearing the ring, it feels unnatural. This may be what our meetings with God will feel like at first. Maybe a bit awkward and unnatural at first. 

Then if you ever take the ring off, the absence of the ring feels very unnatural. You notice it being gone. This is what it is like when we miss our scheduled appointment with God after we consistently talk with Him daily. We notice the feeling of something missing. Never get comfortable with the feeling of missing your appointment with God. Be sensitive to time away from Him. 

FIND A SPACE

Matthew 6:6 “But thou, when thou prayest, enter into thy closet, and when thou hast shut thy door, pray to thy Father which is in secret; and thy Father which seeth in secret shall reward thee openly.”

In this verse, Jesus is comparing the hypocritical prayers of the religious leaders with the sincere, intimate prayers that please God. The hypocritical prayers are loud, attention seeking, and overall ingenuine which is displeasing to God.

Instead, Jesus taught to pray in private, away from public view or ostentation. He instructs us to find a private space that symbolizes a setting apart for communion with God. The emphasis is on the personal, intimate relationship between the believer and God. The principle of sincerity and authenticity in prayer—praying not to be seen by others but to connect genuinely with God- will be rewarded by the Father via assurance of His presence, peace, and answers to prayer that align with His will and purposes.

Just like everything else in our Christian life, we have to assess our heart in the situation. Our position and disposition as well as our motives and methods should be genuine. Assess your heart’s attitude in prayer, emphasizing the significance of genuine, private communion with God as a vital aspect of the believer’s spiritual life.

We have rented many different houses, apartments, condos, etc. with the nature of our job. Because of this, I do not always have the *best* space to meet with God in prayer. It sounds like this is an excuse to not meet with Him (and it technically is), but if you enjoy your surroundings, you will want to go back each day! Because our living situations have always been rentals, I have had to get creative with my space. Like I mentioned earlier, in one setting, I found my space in my car. This worked best for me at that stage in life because it offered alone time, quietness, and an environment surrounded by God’s beauty. In other situations, we have had office space, outdoor seating areas, an extra bedroom, etc. where I was able to pray.

What I am trying to say is, you have to make it work! Find somewhere you can be alone with God.  

Decrease and increase the friction: 

This is a principle I learned while reading a productivity book. I first applied it to my fitness lifestyle of exercising and eating healthier, but I quickly realized this applies to everything in life. So what does it mean to decrease and increase friction? 

This means increasing the work and ease of access to something that is an unhealthy habit to prevent you from doing it. So, if you have a habit of eating junk food, increase the friction by NOT buying the food, putting the food in a space that is not easily accessible (make it extra hard to get to it!), or creating some type of barrier to prevent you from habitually reaching for it. If it is decreasing the amount of time you spend on your phone, you could put a screen time limit on the phone, only put your charger outside of your bedroom/ in an area that you do not regularly spend time on your phone, or put your phone in a lock box at a certain time in the day. Whatever the unhealthy habit is that you are trying to break, make it hard to access that habit. 

We want to increase the friction (work) for the bad habits and decrease the friction for the good habits. If you want to increase a healthy habit, decrease the friction to create lower hanging fruit that is easier to access. So, if you want to eat healthier, prepare meals for the week, present the vegetable and fruit at the front of the refrigerator, and only buy healthy foods. If you want to work out in the morning before work, lay your clothes out the night before, have your materials ready ahead of time, and find a way to wake up easier (for me this was a sunrise alarm). Does the friction principle make sense? Good! Let’s apply it to our prayer life. 

Increase friction:

What is causing you to NOT spend time in prayer? Identifying the barrier is the first step in planning how to solve the problem. If it is spending too much time on your phone, not waking up early enough, or putting more emphasis on other things in your day, make it difficult to achieve these negative habits until you have completed your prayer time. Put your phone in an area that is not easily accessible, put your alarm clock away from beside your bed to force you to get up to turn it off, or create a schedule for the day that puts your alone time with God first. 

Decrease friction:

How can you access this time easier?

• Lay your prayer journal, and materials needed for your prayer out ahead of time. 
• Once you are in your space, do not leave until you are finished. 
• Get a prayer journal, prayer outline, and a list of your prayer requests. 
• Just start praying. Sometimes, my flesh does not want to pray. However, when I push myself through it and start praying, I always receive such a blessing from that day’s prayer time with God. 

GET A PRAYER JOURNAL

For years now, my sister- in- law has gifted me and my sister a prayer journal by Val Marie Paper for Christmas. We loved it so much the first Christmas she gifted it to us, that we request one every year! My prayer life changed dramatically due to this prayer journal. I learned how to effectively organize my prayers, the importance of writing my prayers, and the sovereignty and goodness of God throughout the years. The journal has templates and prompts to fill in for each month of the year. The templates include these prompts to fill in and pray over:

• Attribute of Christ
  • What attributes do I want to focus on this month to be more Christ- like? Need ideas? Click here to read my blog post about the Fruit of the Spirit. 
• Scriptures to memorize
  • Write the scriptures you want to memorize for the month. 
• The world and nation
  • Write specific prayer requests for the current situation of the world and nation. For example I always include: our president, the presidential election, Israel, missionaries, military, and anything else that may specifically be happening within America and the world. 
• My community
  • Write specific prayers for your community that are linear to events/ situations happening. For example, I like to include: growth in churches, safety, our school systems, foster care, drug addictions, and family involvement.  
• My church
  • Write specific prayers for your church. Especially if there is a special event coming up. For example, I like to include: growth in the church, outreach, our pastor and staff, discipleship, and events coming up. 
• My loved ones
  • Write specific prayers for your spouse, boy/girlfriend, children, etc. I use this section to ask my husband what he would like me to pray for him about each month. 
• My family
  • Write specific prayers for your parents and siblings. I use this section to pray for specific situations that are happening in each of their lives. 
• My friends
  • Write specific prayers for your friends. Because of the nature of our jobs being travel therapy, I do not get to see my close friends as much as I would like to. So, each month I send them a text message asking how I can help pray for them that month. This is a great way for me to keep in touch with them and stay connected even though we are miles away from each other. Over the years and throughout our different travel therapy assignments, I have had the joy of adding more friends to my list. 
• Those who are lost
  • Write down the names of those who have not accepted Jesus as their Savior. Some of the names I have in my prayer journals have been repeated over the years. I have faith that I will one day be able to move these names to the answered prayers section!
• Myself
  • Write down specific prayers for yourself. What areas do you need to work on to be more like Christ? What desires and requests do you bring to God? What are you currently worrying about? Bring it all to God!
• Big Goals
  • Write down specific goals in life that you are praying for. I love this section because of how much it has changed over the years! It has gone from “graduate SLP school” to “pay off the car”. I love seeing how much we have grown in our stages of life over the years. 
• Three blank prompts for you to fill in
  • These are for you to fill in whatever topics you want to pray about. I like to fill these in with these specific prompts: Future, Finances, Other. In the future section, I have prayers regarding what we desire one day (a house, land, children, etc.). In finances, I have prayers regarding the current financial stage we are in (this used to be tuition now it is paying off the car!). In other, I write down requests that do not have a specific section they could fit in (prayer requests made at church, a request someone asked me to pray about, a situation I am aware of that needs prayers, etc.). 
• Answered prayers
  • Write down how God answered prayers that month. Even if you did not write down the prayers in the journal, still write it down if God answered that prayer! Sometimes, God answers a prayer that I did not even pray but had been worrying about. This section exemplifies His grace, mercy, and love for us. 

ORGANIZE YOUR PRAYERS

I use each section to organize my prayers. Before, I thought I had to pray about every single prayer request I had in one sitting. I was not fervently praying about these requests, just naming them. Trying to go through each one was very time consuming, and I was just trying to rush through it. So, I learned through the resources that come with the journal to organize my prayers. Using this method, I am able to be detailed in my prayers with each request.

Here is how I organize my prayers: 

• Everyday I go through the model of the Lord’s prayer. When I get to the Lord’s will part, I pray for specific requests that are very pertinent in my and my husband’s lives currently, my family and their safety, and any requests that are heavy on my heart.
• After I follow the model of the Lord’s prayer, I pray for the attribute I am focusing on that month.
• Then depending on the day of the week, I pray over that specific topic.
• So for Monday, I pray for our world, nation, community, and church. On Tuesday’s, I pray for the specific requests that my husband provided to me as well as the specific prayers for my family. I follow this pattern for the remaining days of the week. 

It also has a section of conversation where you can openly write your prayers to God. This is where I include my “God shot” each day to reflect on what I have read in my Bible Study.

Read more about “God shot” in this blog post!

The last section of the journal is the gratitude section where you can write thanksgivings to God. It coincidentally has exactly 1,000 lines which is linear to the 1,000 gifts challenge that I wrote about above! 

Like I said, I have received a new prayer journal for many years now. It is amazing to go through my old prayer journals to see requests I was praying for, requests I am still praying about, answered prayers, God’s protection, and how much I have grown over the years in my relationship with God. 

You do not have to get the exact same prayer journal that I have, but I highly recommend finding one that is similar so you can GROW in your prayer life!

Here is the link again to the prayer journal

I pray that this post has helped you gain more understanding and knowledge in the importance of prayer. I also pray that this has helped you GROW in your prayer life! Please let me know in the comments other ways you GROW in your prayer life!